Mark Plays ‘Portal 2’: Chapter 8 – The Itch

In the eighth chapter of Portal 2, GLaDOS and Chell must succeed in conquering Wheatley’s increasingly strange and dangerous chambers. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to play Portal 2.

Chapter Eight: The Itch

It just keeps getting better. IT’S SO AMAZING.

Gameplay

This game certainly relies on its own past, but does so in a way so that you’re forced to use nearly every device or technique you’ve learned from the beginning. Every chamber Wheatley builds for you requires around five steps minimum to complete, often needing lightning-speed reactions from you so that you aren’t chopped to pieces my lasers or left to plunge into a pit that extends miles below you. Nearly every chamber is guaranteed deadly if you’re not careful, and I certainly died in at least three of them.

Not only are the gels here, and the beams, and the cubes, and the Aerial Faith Plates, but this chapter introduces beams. Or Beams. I don’t know if they have an Official Name. These beams, which have two complimentary colors and travel in two directions based on the color, are ways of traveling over large gaps and transporting the gels when you need to spread them everywhere. This has a similar effect as the gameplay in chapter seven. You have to do a bit of construction in the chamber before it’s totally playable.

I also felt like this was the first time the logic of Portal‘s gameplay became so ingrained in my head that it was frustratingly hard. I conquered most rooms in under ten minutes! I was really proud of this. They weren’t necessarily easier; hell, that room with the three turrets behind the glass was EXTREMELY HARD and I kept messing up and ARGH. It’s just that my mind just hit the right creative wavelength, and I was able to complete this entire chapter rather rapidly. I DIDN’T FEEL LIKE I SUCKED AT THIS GAME, BASICALLY. Honestly, I had a great time playing this.

Characters

I do miss Cave Johnson, and I don’t expect to see him again in the game. The most monumental change in Portal 2 comes in the reversal of roles between GLaDOS and Wheatley, whose characterization has become something entirely unexpected. Throughout chapter eight, GLaDOS helps you and encourages you not only to beat the chambers, but assures you that they’ll find a way out. GLaDOS does this. The same character that spent most of this game and all of the last game leading you to your death has accepted that you must work together to beat Wheatley.

Wheatley, on the other hand, is not only an antagonist, but the writers have brilliantly subverted the trope concerning AI antagonists: Wheatley is not very good at being intelligent. Hell, when you start playing his chambers, they’re awful. That first chamber of his was so deceptively easy that I thought it was a trick. Then he makes you do it again. Oh my god. His rooms are often broken, sloppy, and misguided. You’re not even solving the intended rooms; you’re basically doing what you can with what you’ve been given. On top of this, it’s just a treat to listen to Wheatley and GLaDOS bicker with one another.

Music

Great as always! I especially love when Wheatley decided to play classical music and GLaDOS’s response sounded like it was rolling their eyes. Well, tonally, that is. They don’t have eyes.  I loved the music during the part where Wheatley tricks you onto stepping on that Aerial Faith Plate.

Graphics

Wow, we’re back to the dark, shiny, and modern chambers. Here, though, they’re still a mess, and the design is intentional. They really do look like incomplete rooms. Often, I’d arrive in a room and have to wait until Wheatley finished assembling it.

I did experience a few moments of lag, but you know, that’s not the games fault. I didn’t ever expect to use my MacBook Pro for gaming, so I think I might have to do some upgrades in the future. Otherwise, I’m just constantly impressed by how smooth and non-buggy this game is. Granted, it’s been out for some time. I remember how bad some of the bugs and glitches were when Fallout: New Vegas were. I got that on release day and got stuck in a building within the first six hours. WHOOPS. I’m glad I don’t have to worry about that.

Story

If the last chapter was about a progression through time, this chapter feels like a deconstruction of Aperture, both literally and figuratively. Obviously, these chambers are incomplete. They toy with the notion of what this game is supposed to be. Wheatley is building these not because it’s for a specific end. He has an itch. This idea – that GLaDOS was programmed to be satisfied by the completion of rooms – is exaggerated in Wheatley. On top of that, he starts stealing rooms that belonged to GLaDOS. You’d think this would be good, since GLaDOS is on your side now and you can just get the solutions from her. But then it’s revealed that the AI running the Enrichment Center cannot give the solutions or they’ll experience pain. So we get to experience this part of the story as the layers of the AI running things are peeled back. Their programming is far more complicated than we had thought it was.

Wheatley then becomes upset that you are able to beat many of these rooms, which struck me as kind of strange. Wasn’t he pleased by this? Why would he suddenly change his mind? I initially wrote it off as another side affect of being overwhelmed with power. But once I approached that final chamber and was tricked into being jettisoned into the air to be presented to Wheatley, GLaDOS said that it was clear he discovered the Cooperative Testing Initiative. It was something they created before Chell killed them in the first game, allowing the rooms to be tested by non-human subjects.

And then I’m thrust before Wheatley on a tiny platform in the middle of nothing, and he says, “This is the part where I kill you.”

Oh. Fuck.

Highlights

The “Love it till DEATH” sequence of dialogue was fantastic.

A screenshot of Chell looking through a window upon a room full of Companion Cubes THAT HAVE LEGS NOW AND ARE WALKING AROUND.

Is this seriously what Wheatley has been spending his time doing? No wonder the nuclear reactor is gonna blow. HE IS THE WORST AI EVER.

A screenshot of one of Wheatley’s new chambers. The word TEST is spelled on the wall in bright, lit-up letters.

Wheatly, you spent all this time up here – ages, really – and this is the sign you came up with.

A gold star with “you tried” in comic sans in the middle.

A gold star for you, Wheatley.

A view of Chell traveling up a beam with an orange portal in the ceiling.

Traveling in these beams kind of made me dizzy. SCIENCE.

A screenshot of a chamber that is all-black. There is a blue beam traveling up to the ceiling, where a cube turret thingy is sitting on a red button.

Okay, everyone, I am so proud of myself. I FIGURED THIS ENTIRE PUZZLE OUT ON THE FIRST TRY. It made me so happy that I laughed until I nearly cried.

An all-black chamber with three criss-crossing red laser beams that form an upside-down A of sorts.

FUCK THIS ROOM. Okay, it wasn’t that bad, but this room was PRECARIOUS. You had to set up so many things, and traveling on that goddamn moving platform was RIDICULOUS. Like, you had to stop it at the right point, turn off the lasers, walk you and the Redirection Cube to the other half, turn the lasers on, then start the platform again, then position the – OH GOD I CAN’T. I did feel quite accomplished when I was done.

A screenshot of a very long chamber with a strip of red acceleration gel that leads up a ramp. There’s a blue beam thingy in the background.

I LOVED THIS CHAMBER. That’s probably because I also figured this out with only two attempts. The first time, I went flying off the ramp and realized I hadn’t checked to see what was on the other side. So I landed in nothing. Whoops.

oh god ONLY TWO MORE LEFT UNTIL I’M DONE. I’m scared.

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Wheatley Laboratories. Home to the only test chamber that genuinely scares me. Chamber 12, with the laser grid and moving platform. Other chambers in both games have been frustrating or creepy but this one just fills me with pure fear. The height doesn't bother me in the other chambers but here, couple with the tense music and the occasional camera shakes as something explodes in the distance it scares the hell out of me. I might be wrong but I think that, at least in this part of the game, this is the closest you get to one of those empty observation rooms and it was here that it hit me that there really is nobody left besides Chell and a bunch of AIs.

Stephen Merchant's performance throughout this chamber is just amazing, with Wheatley's...interesting reactions to test solutions and just generally being terrible at being evil. GLaDOS gets in some pretty funny moments as well, he snickering after she tricks Wheatley into shocking himself is so devious but cute in weird way. I also love her tone on "Ohhh no, he's playing classical music".

Frankenturrets, just, they're so sad and cute with the little trembles and chirruping noises. Even they recognise the paradox and shut down which just makes them even sadder. Even though I feel bad for them, making the three regular turrets bounce around with Repulsion gel will never stop being funny. That chamber did take me a long time to get through the first time, I kept dropping the gel in the wrong place and only catching one turret at a time. So frustrating.

but this chapter introduces beams. Or Beams. I don’t know if they have an Official Name.

Excursion Funnel is the official name, and now that I think about it I realise it's the only one of the new elements whose name isn't actually mentioned in game. Which actually makes some sense from an in-game perspective. As GLaDOS says, she was "In it for the science" just like Cave, they're focusing on learning about how the test subjects interact with the objects so they'd tell you what you're meant to be working with. Wheatley just cares about his reward for you solving the tests so he's just going to leave you to it. Or he just doesn't know what they're called.
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2 replies · active 653 weeks ago
Chapter 8: The Itch

• Yay, back to testing without having to figure out how to go between chambers.

• Only Wheatley would think of fusing Cubes and Turrets.

• I love how insultingly easy Wheatley's chambers are.

• Okay, so the other day I questioned whether Wheatley really was as stupid as GLaDOS claims. Given his answering the paradox immediately, I think we can conclude that he is. Heh.

"Luckily, by the looks of things, he knows as much about test building as he does about logical contradictions." Yeah, but you kinda gotta worry that he'd make an insolvable test. He wouldn't do it on purpose, he likes it when we solve the tests, but... you know, the whole moron thing.

• I feel too sorry for the poor little dissected Turrets affixed to the Frankencube.

• ...until the pancaker moves the Cube from where I had it placed to somewhere I couldn't shoot a portal under and I have to go and move it back. And put it on a side where the Turret can't move the Cube this time. Grr.

• Oh, how I wish I could have seen my face when I realized the way to deal with the Turrets in the test with the Repulsion Gel was to COAT THEM IN IT. And then again when I made it happen. Vg pbzrf hc ntnva va gur cneg jurer ur xvyyf lbh, ohg sbe fbzr ernfba vg'f abg fb sha gurer.

"I know we're in a lot of trouble and probably about to die. But that was worth it."
"For the record, you are adopted, and that's terrible. But just work with me."
"After seeing what he's done to my facility, after we take control again, is it alright if I kill him?"
"Alright, he's not even trying to be subtle anymore. Or maybe he still is, in which case, wow, that's kind of sad."
======
So, question regarding Monday and Tuesday:

Jurer qbrf puncgre 9 raq naq gur svanyr ortva? Gurer bayl pyrne oernx vf jura TYnQBF fraqf Jurngyrl gb wbva gur Fcnpr Pber naq chyyf Puryy onpx, ohg gurer'f abg zhpu yrsg nsgre gung.
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2 replies · active 653 weeks ago
Sorry about the lift. It's, uh... out of service. Because it melted.

If you smash all of the monitors in the chambers, Wheatley says some pretty amusing things. Lbh pna oernx gur bar ol gur pngjnyx jvgu gur fznful cyngr naq gur benatr try, gbb, ohg vg'f abg va guvf ivqrb. Ba zl ynfg cynl guebhtu, V fznfurq vg, fb V pna'g erzrzore vs ur fnlf nalguvat qvssrerag be vs ur fnlf gur fnzr guvat jura lbh fznfu gur try ghor. Jura lbh fznfu gur zbavgbe, ur fnlf fbzrguvat yvxr, "V'yy gnxr gung nf n 'ab.' Svar, gura. Yrg gur orfg zna jva- fcurer! Yrg gur orfg fcurer jva."



My favorites are, "Aren't you Little Miss Clever? Little Miss Smashy-Smash?" and "Honestly, I'd have a little lie down if I were you. Have a nap!" And "Just stopppp iiiiiit."

And, from the same artist who had the awesome humanized Wheatley animations, an epic Doctor Who/Portal 2 crossover!




[link]
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2 replies · active 653 weeks ago
and now that we've made it to the Wheatley Labs section, Aperture Science logos through the years (including unsued designs from the first game:


source
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2 replies · active 652 weeks ago
I love Wheatley, but he's not nearly as amusing as a test overseer as GLaDOS or Cave Johnson, or as he'd been as your sidekick, but still amusing, and hey, POTaDOS really picks up the slack, y'know?

(Is Storage Cube->Companion Cube the new Endless->Eternals?)

I can't help but notice that the supposedly 'broken' chambers Wheatley is just slapping together on the fly still function perfectly fine... Like, if you took out the destroyed aesthetics (say, fill in the bottomless pits with deadly water instead) they'd all mostly just look like normal chambers... Also, the game definitely gets a bit harder here, so that's cool

The game now has DLC for player generated content, the Perpetual Testing Initiative, and some of the player made levels are FUCKING PHENOMENAL (and just the level of detail the game let's you play around with is a beautiful thing), but I've not even dared to go into the actual creation process... I just know I'd make Wheatley's first chambers look absolutely brilliant by comparison

I kinda feel bad for the Frankenturrets... But they provide another of the little details I really love! When GLaDOS tries to paradox Wheatley to death, and he's apparently so poorly programmed (or I guess well programmed, since they went out of their way to make him unintelligent...not even sure how you do that but okay, Aperture Science) the cube-turrets in the room all short out and freeze up... The turrets have a better artificial intelligence than Wheatley! Which...which makes spending two games laser-ing, Emancipation Grill-ing, and dropping heavy objects on them and such that much worse, doesn't it?

Also there was that part where Wheatley points out that they do in fact feel pain...

I'm so sorry, turrets! ; . ;

Also, where did those giant monitors Wheatley has in all the chambers come from? GLaDOS never had those (Vf vg n fcbvyre gb cbvag bhg lbh pna oernx gurz? Vg'f bayl tbbq sbe n ovg bs rkgen qvnybthr, naq na npuvrirzrag, abg ernyyl nalguvat vzcbegnag, ohg va pnfr Znex zvffrq gubfr...)

(I am the amazing Worries-About-Nonsense-Man)
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Anyone else feel kind of sorry for Wheatley?

I mean, it seems as if the homicidal urge to test isn't him. He has literally been reprogrammed to do it. It almost feels like our little bumbling robot buddy from the first half of the game has been brainwashed into evil. I mean, GLaDOS is relatively nice when out of her body, and so was Wheatley- and I just want them all to be friends and have cool SCIENCE adventures, is that too much to ask?!?

Side question...Mark, what exactly is the Tuesday review composed of? I only expected it to go until Monday.
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4 replies · active 653 weeks ago
ah, the dialogue that put Stephen Merchant fangirls into a tizzy~
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Yes, so, I am utterly convinced that this is a really fun game that I would never be able to play. I've watched a couple of playthrough scenes (not the whole game, just twenty minutes here and there of parts Mark's already played) and all I can think is "... how the HELL does anyone figure out what you're supposed to do???" Wheatley's rooms would be the end of me.
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10 replies · active 652 weeks ago
Can I please just take a second to say how much my week has been made by this project? I've been super stressed out preparing to leave home for my first year of uni, and looking forward to reading your write-ups on this every day has been a complete highlight for me. I'd kind of dropped off commenting a lot on these sites because I never felt I had much to contribute? But now you're doing video games I actually KNOW THE STUFF YOU'RE DOING and so on so this has just been a really nice way for me to unwind. Basically I'm just saying 'thanks for being awesome and fun to read!'

Anyway, this is probably my favourite single chapter in the entire game, to be honest. I love the role reversal with GLaDOS and Wheatley, and I love how they make it feel CONVINCING; I can believe GLaDOS has reasons for helping out, I can believe Wheatley lost it when he was put in her mainframe. The writing for them both in this chapter is perfect and hilarious, as is the voicing. God, imagine having to put up with both those two at once. Chell must be gritting her teeth the entire time.

And I agree that the whole way these test chambers are created is so neat. From a storytelling perspective, it's the millionth example Portal 2 gives of integrating story and context with its gameplay- the way they're badly designed and disintegraring, and the fact that this doesn't actually hold up the gameplay at any point. So neat. Gosh, this game is so good I sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed.

I'm pretty sure the entire classical music part is just one of the funniest parts of this game. God, GLaDOS' voice. Somewhere between the most intense eyerolling and an'oh, for fuck's sake' sentiment. Perfection.

Speaking of GLaDOS, the way her character feels subtly different throughout the last couple of levels always feels like it reaches a peak here for me? I always wondered if it had to do with being out of the mainframe; that coding to create 'the itch' certainly worked its magic on Wheatley, after all. She's certainly not any nicer (though for obvious reasons, she's more helpful), but she's more emotive almost? Man, I just really love the development her character gets throughout this game. You see her in so many different ways, and it's ALL through dialogue. Fantastic. (Can you tell I love GLaDOS? I really, really love GLaDOS. It's a problem.)
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Hi, everyone! So, I'll make an official post later today once I figure out logistics, but it looks like Mass Effect will not be the next game for the site. I cannot get the copy I bought through Steam to work at all. It freezes once you land on Eden Prime. I have tried every single possible solution that is to be found online: updating drivers, running as admin, running in compatibility mode, running from MassEffect.exe instead of the Launcher, doing a fresh install of Windows 7 and re-updating Windows, doing a brand new partition of my drive AND another new install of Windows 7....

Yeah. I wasted 48 hours, spent too much money that I can't really afford, and got nothing out of it.

I already own Dragon Age: Origins, so I'm going to try it out. If it works fine, we'll start that next week. I'll buy the ME Trilogy for PS3 in November!
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19 replies · active 652 weeks ago
Chapter 8: The Itch

Frankenturrets! I love them, they're adorable. I loved them MORE once I figured out how to drop them on things in such a way that they wouldn't immediately start crawling off.

I love getting to use the gels in the modern testing chambers, plus we get Excursion Funnels! The one room where you have to use the funnel to drop the repulsion gel on the turrets never stops being old. (Gur bayl orggre bar vf va gur arkg puncgre jurer lbh unir gb cbegny gur try vagb gur ebbz shyy bs gheergf naq gurl nyy obhapr nyy bire gur cynpr)

And then finding out that there is a built-in incentive to GLaDOS's body to test is just...urgh. Awful. And of course Wheatley Britta's being in charge of Aperture. OF COURSE.

One of my favorite parts:


The Aperture blue screen of death. 'Press any key to vent radiological emissions into atmosphere. Consult reactor core manual for instructions on proper reactor core maintenance and repair.' I guess Wheatley couldn't find the any key? (Good for us, I think.)

And I love GLaDOS being snarky back to Wheatley. Their back and forth is so much fun.

GLaDOS: "'Skeletons.' Right, I guess I DID stockpile some tests. Just as mementos, though..."

"Remember when I told you that he was specifically designed to make bad decisions? Because I think he's decided not to maintain any of the crucial functions required to keep this facility from exploding."

Wheatley: "For god's sake, you're BOXES with LEGS! It is literally your only purpose! Walking onto buttons! How can you not do the one thing you were designed for?"

"So that's just what I was doing. I was just reading... ah... books. So I'm not a moron. Anyway. Just finished the last one. The hardest one. Machiavelli. Do not know what all the fuss was about. Understood it perfectly. Have you read that one?"

"Had a brainwave. I'm going to tape you solving these, and then watch ten at once-get a more concentrated burst of science. Oh, on a related note: I'm going to need you to solve these ten times as fast."


And if you smash any of the Wheatley monitors:

"Aw. Bless your little primate brain. I'm not actually in the room with you. Am I? Technology. It's complicated. Can't hurt the big god face." (and many others!)
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1 reply · active 653 weeks ago
Argh, that one with the three turrets behind glass! I was being such an idiot; I was so used to using the "beam" as transport that I forgot I could just step through a portal and get there the easy way.

And I only thought of using the blue gel on the turrets because I saw it in one of the game ads, ha,ha.
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2 replies · active 639 weeks ago
The chamber with the turrets behind glass was the level that finally broke me. I had to look it up on youtube. Or, well, start to look it up only to let the video play a little before freaking out and shutting it off because dangit, I could solve this!

(Spoiler alert: no I couldn't, I had to go back and watch the dang video and hang my head in shame because man I could NOT figure out what to do at all.)

Chamber 12, looking back, was probably my favorite though I did accidentally kill myself on that laser grill once when I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing with my portals. And I think I might be the only person who was legitimately scared of the frankenturret-cubes the first time they're encountered in the game. Once I got over it I realized they were pretty cute even though I would much rather a plain ol' companion cube myself.
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I can't believe you did this stuff so easily, Mark. You officially do NOT suck at video games, so never say that again. :P

I mean, for a while this chapter was a breath of fresh air after all of my struggles in chapter 6 and 7, but that stopped once I got to the more difficult chambers.

"I FIGURED THIS ENTIRE PUZZLE OUT ON THE FIRST TRY. It made me so happy that I laughed until I nearly cried." YEAH, GOOD FOR YOU. *not bitter at all* No happy, no laughing, but the nearly crying part's kinda true.

But seriously, I really do love this game. I'm just used to looking up solutions after spending half an hour on the same puzzle, but this time I'm resisting my urge to do that. I still haven't checked out a walkthrough (I'm so proud!), and hopefully I won't have to. I'm predicting a lot of deaths in the next chapter, though.

Now it's time to play some more Portal 2. Maybe even the rest of the game? Possibly.
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Yeah, the chamber with the turrets behind the glass stumped me, especially as I was trying to destroy all of Wheatley's monitors and just couldn't A) get one of the turrets to not get blue-gelled off the platform, and 2) could not get myself on the platform once I had a single turret left. I think I used up my swear word-quota for the week on that one chamber alone.

I hadn't even suspected a trap, though, at the end there. It looked really straightforward, and Wheatley said two chambers left! He's not supposed to be cunning and spring a trap on me early. Darn you, Wheatley! I sort of wanted to complete that chamber, to see what was what. Couldn't you have ambushed me in the elevator?

ETA to fix the weird smiley problem; I need to remember that B plus closing parentheses are a bad combo.
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The walking companion cubes struck a perfect balance between "ADORABLE HUG" and "nononogetawaycreepy." Just...the way the legs twitch.......

Turrets in Portal are cute machines of doom, not spider cube things. brrrr
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I have to admit that Wheatley Laboratories was just terrifying it filled me with absolute terror every time I played this area. Even when I play the latest PSN games nothing even comes close in terms of the fear-factor.

By the way Mark, thanks for putting together these stories of your gameplay - it's extremely entertaining to read :D
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