Mark Plays ‘Dragon Age: Origins’: Hour 33

In the thirty-third hour of Dragon Age: Origins, I experience nostalgia for the days when I thought the Brecilian Forest was the hardest part of the game, and I realize I’m almost done. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to play Dragon Age: Origins.

Hour Thirty-Three

I’ve nearly devoted a day and a half of my life to this game, and while that’s not long once you consider that I’m 29, it feels like I’ve been playing Dragon Age: Origins for a while. Nothing has quite put that into context for me like traveling back to the Brecilian Forest, which was the first major area that I explored in this game. I WAS LIKE A CHILD THEN. Wait, I have to make this joke: I was literally a different age when I started this game. HAHAHA, FUCK YES.

This weird sense of nostalgia for the game started when I was stopped on the road to the Brecilian Forest and attacked by a group of Wild Sylvans. I FORGOT HOW MUCH I DESPISED EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM. Oh my god, when they do that super annoying thing where they trap you in thorns, I just hate them universally and want to burn them all to the ground. HATE THEM. HATE. Also, why is there money on the corpse of a tree??? That makes even less sense than spiders having money on them. Whatever, I have like 275 sovereigns right now. WHAT SHOULD I BUY WITH MY MONEY. I HAVE SO MUCH OF IT.

Anyway, upon arriving in the Brecilian Forest, I just felt weird. While I had a few things I needed to do, it was kind of… well, empty! I recalled how overwhelmed I was when I first started playing this game. I was determined that I’d get stuck every hour, that this would all be a disaster, and everyone ever would hate me for not being good at Dragon Age. Look, my anxiety just does this to my brain! However, not only have I been able to adapt to the gameplay of Dragon Age, I’ve had a great time. Oh, right, and I’ve lost my shit over a billion plot twists. Remember when I thought the story of Zathrian was the most fucked up thing in the game? AHAHAHAHA LAUGHING TO KEEP FROM CRYING oh my god the broodmother OH GOD.

I got to thinking about that when a group of elves confronted me about the location of the werewolves. Right, there were once werewolves in this game. Can you actually recruit them to fight against the Blight at the end of the game? You can tell me this (ONE OF YOU), because I’d sure like to try to do this during my second playthrough. Anyway, I managed to remind the elves of what happened to Zathrian, and they backed down. Fellow elves, don’t we have much bigger things to worry about, like THE IMPENDING BLIGHT APOCALYPSE? Actually, I just found it funny that SO MUCH TIME HAS PASSED and then these folks confronted me. Like, their issues are totally valid! They lost family members, they want revenge, and their mourning. I get this! I was just taken aback because I had forgotten this entire part of the game. WHOOPS.

That means I also forget that when you disturb the wards on those gravestones in the Southern part of the forest, YOU SPAWN A REVENANT. OH. RIGHT. THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS. WHOOPS.

The final thing I did was fire that arrow to notify someone that their passage was safe, get immediately ambushed, which is not even possible, I swear. They like APPEARED OUT OF THIN AIR. Can mages apparate in this game? No? THEN WHAT THE HELL.

At the end of this hour, I traveled to Redcliffe. With just one final mission left, I realized I had to start to accept that this was coming to an end. I told Owen that his daughter was nowhere to be found in the Redcliffe Castle, he was understandably upset, and that was that. Oh god, I don’t have any missions left that to complete. Well, wait, there are a few I refuse to complete: giving up twenty health poultices. Yeah, fuck you, I am keeping that shit.

So, this is it? I headed back to the Blackstone Irregulars box to make sure that the only mission they had left for me was the one about upping their supplies, and I found three more side missions. But after that? OH GOD. THAT’S IT.

Here’s what I’m going to do:

1) Complete the three Blackstone Irregulars missions.

2) Do the Warden’s Keep DLC.

3) Do the Landsmeet.

4) Do the Return to Ostagar DLC.

5) OH MY GOD I DON’T KNOW. I don’t know what happens after the Landsmeet. I assume it’s war??? Something like that? I’M SCARED.

6) Complete all of the other 5 DLC campaigns!

7) ????????

8) Profit???

So unprepared, I swear.

My Character Stats

Strength: 27+6
Dexterity: 26+12
Willpower: 22+2
Magic: 14+2
Cunning: 24+7
Constitution: 26+2

Heroic Stats

Kills: 606
Damage dealt: 138100
Friendly fire: 0
Greatest damage dealt: 90
Contribution to party damage: 29
Hit rate: 87
Most powerful foe slain: Revenant
Injuries: 22

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